Friends, members, countrymen, we are gathered here today on this peculiar occasion to witness the marriage of the pleasing Kerry Marie–who looks fashionable in her bridal veil and bustier. If any of you bounders” object to this union, speak now or forever hold your piece in the hand of your prepossession. What’s that? You in the back–you protest this ceremony? Well then, sir, by the powers vested in us, we declare this wedding cancelled. Now stand back and let the little lady have joy herself with this buzz-buddy concealed beneath the honeymoon bed during the time that the groom returns his tuxedo to the rental shop and we have a swallow at the bar. Crashing weddings is hard work.